


Dori Knows

by SarcasticSmiler



Series: Chicken AU [2]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Chicken!AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 11:50:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7616968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarcasticSmiler/pseuds/SarcasticSmiler
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dori finds out about the poultry club...but didn't realise that was what Ori was talking about.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dori Knows

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't much, just something that appeared when I realised I hadn't hit my '200 words a day' goal last night.  
> I find myself wanting to write a few things for this verse so this is the start I suppose, I've a couple of ideas so we'll see where this goes.

The kettle had just boiled when Nori’s phone started vibrating on the counter top. Swiping the screen, while leaving it on the surface, he uttered a quick, “Hey, Dori.”

“ _Don’t you ‘Hey Dori’ me!_ ” his older brother’s voice sounded overly tinny through the phone as he shrieked, there was a good reason Nori hadn’t put the phone to his ear, “ _What’s all this nonsense Ori is spouting about wanting to play with others boys cocks? And joining a club to do so?! What depravities have you been subjecting our innocent little brother too?_ ”

Pouring water into his mug and the awaiting sugar and teabag within, Nori more or less ignored his brother. He knew this call would be coming ever since he’d dropped Ori off the day before, disappearing out the door before Dori could grab him.

“… _den of iniquity_ …”

Apparently sleeping on the issue hadn’t softened Dori’s attitude towards him. As he squeezed the teabag he wondered if Ori had even managed to get a word in about the fact that the club was actually for poultry, and not for what Dori clearly thought it was.

“… _ruining the boy_ … _don’t have to drag Ori down with you_ …”

Milk spiralled out from the centre of his mug as he stirred it in, adding just a drop more for luck.

“… _I’ll not tolerate_ …”

The first sip burned his tongue, scorching a line down his throat and settling like a glowing ember in his stomach. Perhaps it was time to interrupt his brother’s tirade before he burst a blood vessel.

“Dori,” he called, holding the phone a few inches from his ear.

“ _I cannot allow it, I **will not** allow it!_ ”

“Dori!”

“ _What?!_ ”

“I did not take Ori to a den of iniquity, or whatever rubbish you’re spouting. The club is the local poultry society, they show chickens. Ori seemed to like it and made some friends, so we joined him up and I paid for it. You’re welcome for that, by the way. If you could get off your high horse for a bit then Ori has all the paperwork and the number for his friends’ uncle, a Bilbo Baggins. Nice sort, bit of a meddler, you’ll probably love him.”

“ _Chickens?_ ” Dori asked, rather perplexed.

“Yes, chickens. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve a cuppa waiting and an episode of _Jeremy Kyle_ to watch. Goodbye,” with that Nori hung up, cutting Dori off mid-word as he called for him to wait.

As he sprawled out on the sofa, tossing the remote back onto the coffee table to balance precariously on the edge, Nori wondered if he should feel bad for leaving Ori to deal with their older brother on his own. But, on the other hand, he reasoned, the kid had to learn how to scrape Dori off the ceiling when he hit the roof over ridiculous things.

He couldn’t help but groan in frustration when his phone vibrated in his pocket.

Wriggling around, he just about managed to pull his phone free of his clothing, only to blink in surprise at the fact that it wasn’t Dori.

_Dwalin Cock Guy_

Nori grinned, perhaps the day wouldn’t be a total loss after all.

**Author's Note:**

> I do have some smut planned for this verse but you'll have to wait a little for it as I've not written and uploaded smut since I was a teenager and writing it now I'm older is annoyingly hard and at times exceptionally cringeworthy.


End file.
